i am returning to simplicity. no additional information, no physical evidence of the fact that i am actually alive, apart from my own words. and nothing else. i know this sounds strange but i feel the immense need to strip everything down a bare minimum in order to be able to build something else from scratch. to find out who i am, to find out where i want to be. where i need to be. i haven’t deleted anything i’m only pretending that it doesn’t exist. that way i find it easier to create something new. it gives me the illusion that i am starting over. and there’ll be many more like this to come in the future.
looking at the bare sheet of white paper that is my screen i am wondering whether there is any sense to this at all. i am trying to disappear but the rabbit hole is too small. the days are hot, most nights are spent in a certain african bar, dancing until the early hours. and sometimes our roof is the only thing which we need.
susan sontag and patti smith give me the strength that i need right now.
June 13, 2011