on the side of a road

Hong Kong, 2014.

There are many things you can try if you want. And some of them will even give it to you.

We used to frequent a tiny bar on Kowloon side called Roadside Bar. A retro poster hung inside covered by shadows and lights of a disco ball above it.

I used to get drunk, stare at it, smoke one cigarette after another. Norah Jones’ The Fall played on repeat. Josephine never rejected my request to keep the album playing. The words are engraved on the inside of my skull. 彌敦道 still remembers my footprints on the way back home. But who am I now?

Hong Kong returns to me in slow motion. Flashbacks both light and painful.

I still feel the heat of the city on my skin.

I am not sure what happened this week. Or what happened to it.

The waves again. Like clockwork. Something is different this time, though. I’m watching Luther for the umpteenth time.

November. Would you please slow down? I keep repeating myself. Old letters, words; it’s all coming up to the surface and I am not ready for it. They say that time’s supposed to heal ya. But I ain’t done much healing.

I’m taking stock of my life again.