laughing continues. I drink a cup of hot cappuccino with a friend every day. we discuss korea, asia, every day things. for some reason I have started writing a list of people I am going to miss when I leave, if I leave. I am not sure why we are doing this, but maybe because partially it is fun. and heart breaking at the same. I am writing letters but I never send them. I couldn’t. I am looking for anything, I am not looking for much.
I am back to using random scraps of papers to dot down my thoughts and ideas. things are losing and gaining their shape it’s like the universe expanding but shrinking at the same. sometimes I am not exactly sure which direction I am heading but often it doesn’t really matter. people have been trying to convince me of importance of values and principles, but I am still not willing to have any.
sitting in the music room and listening to a very bad cover of sweet child of mine was meaningless but I enjoyed it anyway. I am searching for small pleasures of daily life. I am not able to look ahead yet. one small step at a time.
November 26, 2009