It’s been a difficult month. Uneventful. Mundane, routine, and boring. I can break down my days and weeks into the following pattern: sleep, wake up, go to work, go back home, sleep, repeat. It’s been cold and weary and dreadful. It has snowed a few times this month, leaving the pavement covered in a brown mush that occasionally freezes overnight and turns into a dangerous path on my way to work.
So, I have been avoiding the outdoor. I have been avoiding everything except for my bed and the indefinitely unsatisfied need for coffee. Because I always want more coffee, never less. And I always need more sleep, never less.
But sometimes it’s okay. To slow down, to do less, and to do nothing at all. Unless I want to, forcing myself to accomplish things won’t work. So I am taking it easy.
I eat chocolate, I eat cakes, and I sleep a lot. When winter is over, it’s going to be a completely different story. But for now, I am allowing myself to hibernate. Turn into a polar bear and disappear into depths of my own life. Everything else can wait.
January 24, 2016